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When I started at my company a couple years ago, a coworker, “Sally,” invited me to do social things outside of work.
We went out for drinks a few times and even did an all-day girls day where I ended up crashing on her couch.
She would ask me to do insanely inconvenient personal errands for her (which I never did), and she attempted to demand that we do more full-day/overnight “girls days,” despite me telling her that they were exhausting for me.
If I disagreed with her on anything, I get a lecture about why I was wrong, even on things she clearly had no expertise in, like my health.
After about six months of reasonable normalcy, she became increasingly demanding and almost possessive.
In retrospect, her behavior strongly resembled what an abusive ex-boyfriend did to me, except not nearly as subtle.
She would buy me slightly-too-extravagant gifts when we clearly did not have that level of friendship, at least from my perspective.
Six months ago, after she pulled a scheduling bait-and-switch to trick me into helping her deep clean her apartment and then directed me around like I was her maid, I decided I was done with being pushed around by Sally.
Now she’s saying she wants to “respect my boundaries,” so let’s just go get lunch since I can’t do all-day outings.
I’ve heard that line before from the aforementioned abusive-ex, and I’m not falling for it again.